I was approached last night by my Companion Traveler. He requested we resume our work. He did this by inserting a familiar song in my head – I Swear. Specifically he sent me the chorus: “I swear, by the moon and the stars in the sky, I’ll be there. I swear, like a shadow that’s by your side, I’ll be there…..I’ll love you with every beat of my heart, I swear.” Considering I haven’t heard that song in years (over a decade) I knew immediately where it came from and why. It’s a popular wedding song.
I was reluctant but finally agreed. My one request was that he appear to me in a different form. His normal form upset me too much.
Lucid Dream with Kundalini
Early this morning, I entered into a dream and became lucid quite quickly. My lucidity began to increase upon meeting up with a man who first appeared to me as a bird whose beak was nonexistent. He morphed into a tall, slender man who introduced himself to me. His full name is lost to me now, but his last name was “Scarecrow”.
The man took me to an enclosed, rectangular box resembling the luxury boxes at football stadiums. We looked out the windows and he directed me to a scene below. When I focused outside of the box I was transported into the scene.
I was with a group and an older man, about the age of 70, was my main focus. There was a commotion and we all looked in front of us. There was a massive electrical storm approaching and it made the loudest sound. The storm quickly became a tornado, but it was not like any tornado I had ever seen. It was pure lightening with blue and almost black clouds. It was extremely close and quite menacing. I began to run in the opposite direction but gave up quickly realizing I could not outrun it. I remembering thinking, “I’m going to die and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.” I found myself next to a college campus that was under construction, seeking out a culvert to hide in, but the tornado retreated up into the sky. The threat was over.
The older man retrieved me and we talked about the threat. I asked how he avoided it and he showed me a visual of himself sitting inside the control box of a large excavator. He said, “I was protected”. He showed me that he used the excavator itself on the tornado, putting the bucket inside of it and extinguishing the threat.
As the dream progressed, the older man made it clear to me that he wanted to engage in sexual relations with me. I could feel a distinct pressure, an energy buildup, from him that was very magnetic. There was also a younger man who was pursuing me. I felt both of their interest but the younger man kept his distance. The older man was familiar to me and comfortable. I felt safe with him.
The man frequently asked when I would agree to be with him. I kept avoiding him. The heart bliss was obvious and I was avoiding it, not him. I did allow him to get very close to me, though. When he did, he would touch me and the Kundalini would explode and I would feel this intoxicating draw to be closer to him. I didn’t resist it.
He then began to softly and gently touch my body at the torso. He outlined with his finger circles that were all over my body. They were gray in color and quite large. When he traced the circles I saw that my body was much more voluptuous than it is in reality. I had rolls of fat but I did not care what I looked like. The man continued to touch me, the whole time urging me to be with him, to surrender completely to him. His touch kept lighting the Kundalini and made resisting him almost impossible. I saw one gray circle on my side and began to fill it with a bright red color. It was as if I was tattooing myself and it felt to be the right thing for me to do.
Then I saw myself from the front looking down. My breasts were enormous. Bigger than they were when I was pregnant in this life (and I was a DD!) and just as full. At first I was wanting them gone but then I accepted them, somehow knowing they represented my femininity and fertility – my readiness to be the Goddess. When I accepted them as part of me I saw I was wearing a red, lace, negligee that stopped just below my breasts. I concluded that I was beautiful and felt that way, too. The feeling is hard to describe but it was not just me feeling this way. The man I was with felt that way about me, too, and I felt what he felt and embraced with it.
I remember the man asking if I would go to a hotel with him. I was concerned others would find out and remember feeling a bit nervous. I refused him by avoiding his question but the entire time there was this enormous build-up of energy between us. It was so strong, so beautiful and familiar, that I was having a very difficult time saying no to this man.
We climbed into a white pick-up truck together as we were leaving the gathering. He sat in the passenger seat and I drove. I remember driving into a circular drive. Cars lined it on all sides and one blocked the exit. It forced me to drive in a circle. When I tried to exit the circular drive, another car was in my way. I had to stop. I remember complaining that our group had done this on purpose.
The man propositioned me again, moving so close to me that our bodies touched. I realized I couldn’t resist him anymore. I finally agreed to be with him. He said to me, “You want to use protection.” I heard it as a question, though, and thought immediately of condoms and sex. I got worried and began to reconsider. The man moved toward me and I thought he meant to have sex right there in the truck. Panicked, I retreated. He asked me why I resisted. I told him, “I’m married.” The entire time the Kundalini was flowing and overwhelmingly intoxicating. I am not sure how I resisted it. All I wanted to do was surrender completely to it and to him. Every time the man touched me, which was almost all the time, my body felt to melt into him and become a part of him. It was the most exquisite feeling I have ever felt.
We exited the truck and began to walk out of the circular drive. The whole time we walked, the man had his arm around my waist and the Kundalini raged. I saw a group of women nearby sitting on a parked car. They asked us if we had decided to be together. One woman said, “You should do it in the circle.” I was horrified and said, “I don’t want you to watch!” They all smiled. The man kept me close and continued to urge me to be with him. The Kundalini erupted intensely then and shot down into my root chakra and then back up. I couldn’t handle it. I woke up.
Preparation for Vertical Alignment and Full Exchange
When I woke up the Kundalini was still raging and my Companion was close by. I was grateful that I had not burst into tears from the heart bliss. I was frustrated with myself for still saying “I’m married”. Grrr!
I wondered about the other man who had been pursuing me in the dream. Who was he? I also wondered about the other signs – the scarecrow reference, the tornado, the circles. It didn’t take me long to recognize that the signs were all pointing to “danger” and the need for protection. It was made clear to me that a ceremony would occur and when it did I would need to perform it within a circle of protection.
I could not understand why I would need protection. Protection from what? Surely the Kundalini was safe? Yet I have been receiving the message for some time now – Protect yourself.
In conversing with my Companion answers came quickly. The full-on merge, a vertical alignment, was fast approaching. It is real. It is not a joke. Not a game. The need for protection is because during the alignment there will be an “exchange” and I will be vulnerable. When one soul leaves and another enters there is a “gap” for lack of a better word. Others can interfere. Others who see an opportunity will take it if allowed. That was who the other man in the dream was. Whether there is an actual entity, discarnate soul, or whatever, vying for my body, I don’t know but it sure seems that my guidance is not going to risk it.
I am not worried, though. My group reassures me they will protect me. I do not doubt their ability to protect me. I trust them fully.
I am being prepared for the Hieros-Gamos. It is obvious that I am ready. The dream indicates as much and I have felt ready for some time. I am embracing and fully accepting my femininity – becoming the Goddess. There will be a ceremony held, within a circle of protection. In this ceremony I will fully merge with my masculine aspect and become Whole. Somehow this is also when the soul exchange will be complete.
I am not 100% sure how the Kundalini, the (inner) Hieros-Gamos and the soul exchange all go together. It confuses me. I recognized the departure of the walk-out sometime ago, but residual aspects still remain within my energy field. I know I am not 100% integrated yet because I am still resolving her unfinished business. Healing and delving deeper to clear and restore.
The best I can come to understanding all of this is that the walk-out was a fractured aspect of me who needed to be reintegrated. What will result from the completion of the exchange is unknown to me.
There was an explanation of what Wholeness is, though. I was shown it in a vision. I walked into a large closet or dressing room. It was brightly lit and inside were many rooms. Each room contained within it extremes of something. I didn’t see the particulars. Then I was shown in a diagram the two extremes. For ease of understanding we can use Victim and Villain because I am being reminded of the archetypes as I type this. The two extremes are miles apart but then in a flash of light they are brought together to become one and the same. Victim becomes Villain and Villain becomes Victim. My first thought at seeing this vision was “Paradox”. Yet I have an entire “dressing room” full of these extremes (archetypes) and I am shown all of them will become One with Wholeness. I guess it all makes sense considering I am now hearing, “Wholeness is the transcending of duality”.
Geez. Should I be scared?