A couple of nights ago, I experienced a sudden downturn and fall into depression as a result of more emotional purging. At the time I did not realize what was happening and so did not write about it for the inability to express it correctly. This morning, it is clearer so I want to share now what occurred so as to shed some light on the soul exchange process as I am experiencing it.
Request to Go Home
As written the morning of 1/20/17:
Last night I asked to go Home. This time, I willed it and sent it into every cell of my body, asking the body to let me go; to set me free. Within seconds of this request, I felt a strong, dense energy descend from above me at an angle into my heart chakra. The energy was strange and new yet I was not afraid. I viewed it as a sign that what I was doing was appropriate and so I continued willing every cell of my Being to accept my request. The energy intensified and felt heavy yet comforting, almost like I was being hugged. The energy eventually encompassed all of my upper chakras intensifying in my heart. I continued to repeat, “I want to go Home”, without feeling any emotional upset or release associated with the request. I repeated this request later after the energy passed and the entire sequence repeated. It felt GOOD and right. I felt that finally my request was being heard.
The following day I wondered what had happened exactly but no explanation was provided. That is until this morning.
Comforting the Walk-Out
Yesterday more emotional upheaval came and then left just as suddenly. It seems a pattern lately and I accept, acknowledge and allow these purges when they come. I don’t do this consciously really, it feels second nature, like I have practiced it over and over yet this is all a very “new” experience for me in this body. I had a Knowing that “instructions” were forthcoming prior to bed. I did not question this.
I awoke sometime in the night from several dreams. These dreams painted a picture of the process I am currently undergoing.
In the first dream I was with someone and counting. I counted to five slowly and when I reached 5 my root chakra exploded in energy. There was discussion here I cannot recall now, but a short while later I awoke feeling very upset. I fell asleep soon after.
The next thing I remember is looking at a blonde woman who was bent over and crying. In this experience I was both her and myself. As her, I heard myself tell her that I loved her and reassured her. She replied that she couldn’t go on any longer, that it was too hard and she was dying inside. I could feel her pain, how she felt she had failed at life and it was pointless to continue. She truly felt unable to move forward in her current condition. There were images in this transfer of information along with strong emotion. As the one comforting her, I understood fully her plight and had such sympathy and unconditional love for her and her situation. I felt obligated to help her but this obligation was not wrought with irritation at the delay it would cause me.
Finally, there was a short dream in which I was standing at a door and thought it locked. I heard someone say, “It is open.” So I turned the knob and opened it. A brilliant light shown on the other side.
Recognition and Amazement
When I awoke my guidance was close. There was instant recognition/memory of what had just occurred. My identity was without question, and I knew who she was as well. Though I identified her as me, I also knew she was the me I was helping, the me who was in the process of leaving and allowing me to come in and take up where she left off. She is extremely distraught over leaving and what it will do to her family and her life. She is resisting what it is I will do when she is gone. There was total and complete understanding here on my part and a deep dedication and love.
I won’t say I was without emotion here, but the emotion was distant. To an outside observer, had they witnessed or experienced what I was, they may quickly judge me as “unfeeling” and “emotionless”. Yet this is inaccurate. There IS feeling, compassion, love, etc, but it is without condition, without judgement and without any of what humans tend to associate with emotion. It just IS and there is no reaction to it other than allowance. I laugh now because a memory of her reaction to me in the early years of our bonding was exactly as I stated above. She often grew frustrated with my lack of reaction to her plight, my “stoic” response was unacceptable to her.
After this last dream I spent the rest of the morning in the in-between conversing with my Team. She was quiet and very distant during this time. I could still sense her bent over and grieving. There is an intense healing occurring for her and I am assisting. I am experiencing what it is like to be a guide and oh how interesting! Yet at the same time I am in the driver’s seat of this body! How bizarre yet truly amazing!
To someone who has not experienced a soul exchange what I have written may make absolutely no sense. I will admit that much of it is truly mind boggling even to me. I am being instructed to not analyze here but allow the experience and the Knowing will surface when appropriate. In this final stage of the soul exchange my only goal is to assist the walk-out while continuing her life with as little disruption as possible. Only when she has fully disengaged will I proceed with my mission.