I have been so tired that for the past few days that I’ve been taking a nap in the afternoons when my kids get home from school. I assume the exhaustion is because I asked for whatever upgrades I needed to get done before September hit, but it is more than that. These times of exhaustion are when the majority of the preparation work is being done. Light integration, DNA alteration, Light body activation – all of this and more. I was told by my guidance that I am “healing” and “In Review”. Based upon my dreams I would assume I’m doing some heavy duty clearing and recalibration.
Prior to sleep, I asked my guidance, “What issues do I need to resolve?” Like the night before, I woke up around every two hours. Each time from a dream or conversation that had me wake abruptly and sometimes in confusion.
The Healing Room
In one dreamscape I was visiting a school but when the doors opened it was a place of healing and I was being encouraged to do healing on others. I did this willingly but the feeling was also that I was receiving intense healing myself. What one gives, one also receives.
Issues for Inspection
I had a very strange dream sequence which very obviously was a Review of some sort. I was a mother of twins, one was a boy and the other was a girl. I was also the girl twin. It was like I shifted into the different roles based upon what I was being asked to look at. I remember changing the diaper of the girl twin and noticing her private area was red and inflamed. There was mention that she may have been sexually abused and to be careful of who I let babysit her. Too distracted by what I needed to do, I told the person that I was going to let the same couple watch them as before and left the room.
Then I was the baby girl and there was communication with my twin about what to do because the situation would surely get worse for me. The decision made was that my twin would die so that I could avoid further negative circumstances. If he died, then my mother would take notice, move away from the bad people and I would grow up with a normal life even if it was a life without him. There was a feeling of such love here that it is indescribable.
I was back to being a woman and saw the scenario that was her life. She was being sexually harassed by her boss. If she did not consent to having sex with him whenever he asked, she would lose her job, be humiliated and likely lose her children. There was a sickening felt whenever the boss came around. She was in constant fear and very miserable. She didn’t know how to get out of the situation and she didn’t know how she allowed herself to get into it in the first place. The feeling was overwhelming here. Like death would be the best solution.
There were several shifts in this dream, taking me from one circumstance to another. In one part I was outside watching a young girl with long blonde hair crying. She was very pretty and was singing a song through her tears. I stood next to her and though I noticed her and her situation I was caught up in my own thoughts and issues. For some reason, though, I had a thought that I needed to pay attention to her. So I did. I watched her for a little while, noting how pretty she was and how beautifully she sang. I felt her sadness and how alone she felt. There was great sympathy then for this girl and I reached over and hugged her close. I told her how beautiful she was and how wonderfully she sang and that I loved her.
When I awoke from this dream I was near tears and there was a lump in my throat. One of my guides was there and without him saying anything I knew what these dreams were about. My question had been answered. The dream was highlighting issues that needed resolving still; showing me parts of myself that need to be seen to resolve these issues. I was told I was “In Review” and throughout the rest of the night it was clear that part of this review was to try and help me to move past the wounds, let them go so that I can move forward with the mission I came here to accomplish. It was made very clear to me that I was fully supported both by those in Spirit helping me and by those who are here with me in the physical.
Despite all the messages, I still feel hopeless about the future. Part of a song continues to repeat in my mind:
And I know
The scariest part is letting go
‘Cause love is a ghost you can’t control
I promise you the truth can’t hurt us now