The memory of the actual walk-in event on April 5th was a surprise. I have many questions yet feel it they are unimportant at this time. I do not know why that is, yet at the same time I have an unmistakable knowingness that I will Remember much more soon and when this happens all will be crystal clear.
In the past month or so there has been much upheaval from within. This upheaval was the result of the walk-out for the most part. She was dissecting past life issues, recognizing her participation in karmic patterns and then releasing the energy that had tied her to those particular patterns. She has asked me to complete this cycle when I visit Mt. Shasta in a couple of weeks. I am honored to assist her in this release.
It has been difficult to watch the walk-out struggle yet the process was necessary as it allows her to fully release the remaining energetic ties she has with her present and past lives. In observing this process my understanding of her situation, patterns, personality and purpose has increased. These are important lessons for me as I integrate with this physical body.
The two personalities contained within this body are now becoming more distinct. So much so that the walk-out has become quite embarrassed by her actions and emotional outbursts related to the clearing she has been doing. To see one’s self caught up in repetitive patterns can be quite traumatic in and of itself and with my withdrawal she was seemingly left alone to handle the relinquishing of these patterns the best that she could. Advice was given and taken but the process was still quite difficult for her as the release was connected to suicide.
Suicide presents extensive damage, for lack of a better word, to one’s energetic blueprint as it creates a deep scar within the very core of one’s being. This scar remains so deep, so hidden beneath the individual’s life layers, that to contact it can be quite difficult. One must first acknowledge that such a choice was made, often multiple times. Then one must begin to peel off the layers of repression that hide the core emotions and triggers for the initial event – the one that began the pattern that is to be broken. For the walk-out there was much self-loathing, pride, shame, guilt, regret, bitterness, anger, loneliness, fear, anguish, heartbreak, and many more hidden emotions tied to her ultimate choice to end her incarnation and sever contracts prematurely. Ultimately, the decision to end life must be confronted and the reasoning behind the decisions to do so must be accepted. The most difficult part of this process is refraining from self-judgement as self-judgement only exacerbates the pattern and pulls the walk-out back into the repetitive patterns she is working to relinquish.
Balance must be reached before Wholeness can be had. With Wholeness the integration process will be complete and the walk-out will be presented again with a choice: stay or go. The soul exchange process is never forced and contract alterations are frequent and varied. The final decision is always that of the walk-out. At this time, however, there has not been a reversal of her decision and she is still on track to withdraw completely by June, 2017.
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